One Joke
by DeathByMushrooms
Summary: James Potter has one chance with Lily Evans. But he has to make a sacrifice, first. Can he do it? One-shot. Based on information from Prisoner of Azkaban and Order of the Phoenix


A/N: Right. Here's a more believable idea for anyone that's pondering how Lily and James got together. Lily hates him, James loves her. Haha...  
  
*~LTDan~*  
  
Sirius checked the calendar on the notice board in the Gryffindor common room. "Tomorrow's a full moon, you lot," he said with a grin, pointing to tomorrow's date.  
  
"Hoorah," Remus said dismally over the top of his book.  
  
Sirius grinned at him. "Cheer up Moony. Next weekend is our first authorized Hogsmeade trip!" he said reassuringly, clapping Remus on the back so hard that he jerked forward.  
  
"Right," Remus said in the same tone, returning to his book. "Hogsmeade..."  
  
James and Peter had their heads together not too far away, and they kept glancing at Remus. Sirius caught their eye and winked. "Snivellus is going to have the time of his life..." he muttered, plopping down next to the two, but no one seemed to have heard him.  
  
Remus glanced sideways at the threesome. "What're you plotting?" he said in an undertone.  
  
James and Peter grinned at each other. "Well," James said in a matter-of-factly air. "we were just going to...ahh..." he stopped abruptly and flung something at Remus. The whole common room turned at looked, then went back to what they were doing. They were obviously used to this sort of stuff by now.  
  
Remus wiped brown stuff off his face. "You threw...?" he said, staring at the substance, which was decidedly sticky.  
  
"Prank le Prongs," James said, slapping Peter a high five, and laughing at Remus.  
  
As Peter finished his laughing, Remus tried again: "What did you throw?"  
  
"A mixture of armadillo bile and some sort of sludge Wormtail and I found behind the Shrieking Shack last month," James said in the same voice.   
  
"Which means?" Remus said, continuing to remove the gunk from his face.  
  
"I don't know. But we needed a guinea pig. Oh yeah...would you like to volunteer, Remus?" James said in fraud seriousness.  
  
Sirius wasn't paying any of them the least bit of attention: he was peering at the Marauder's Map intently, making sounds and muttering things like, "Yes," and "Of course," and "Brilliant" under his breath.  
  
"Sirius?" James and Remus said unanimously.  
  
Sirius looked up. "Perfect, mates," he said with the grin that occupied his face when he saw Severus Snape.  
  
James, Remus, and Peter exchanged glances of utter disbelief, and were further surprised when he announced he was going to bed early, and left the common room.  
  
At the exact moment Sirius left, Lily Evans walked by. James jumped out of his seat and ran up to her.  
  
"Hey, Evans," he said with a bit of a conceited grin. Remus and Peter watched sadly from the sidelines, knowing Lily wouldn't have anything to do with him.  
  
Lily kept walking.  
  
"Evans! Hey, Evans, Hogsmeade is this weekend!" he called as she walked past him.  
  
She completely ignored him and sat down next to a girl with sleek brown hair and glasses.  
  
Remus frowned and Peter shook his head. They both looked piteously at him. "She didn't hear me," James said confidently, but it was obvious he was trying to kid himself.  
  
Remus, James, and Peter sat in the common room and talked for a good hour, when Sirius came back downstairs.  
  
"I thought," Remus said, staring at him, "that you were turning in early."  
  
Sirius grinned, shook his head, and grabbed James by the wrist, pulling him up the stairs to the boys' dormitories. When he had him away from the others, he began talking rather quickly.  
  
"I'm going to give Snivellus the hugest treat tomorrow!" he said, his dark brown eyes glinting.  
  
James's hazel eyes sparkled as well. "Really? What're we doing?"  
  
"I'm going to show him Remus - " he gloated proudly, but James cut him off.  
  
"No," he said flatly, his shoulders drooping.  
  
"What! Are you kidding? You don't want to have some fun with him?" Sirius said incredulously.  
  
"No, Sirius. You can't. You could get him killed..." James said slowly, shaking his head at him.  
  
"Prongs - " Sirius pleaded, a frown overcoming his handsome face.  
  
"Tell me you won't do it, Sirius," James said defiantly, his eyes narrowed.  
  
"Fine. Fine, I won't do it!" Sirius said angrily, entering the seventh years' dormitory and slamming the door shut.  
  
James blew, and ran a hand threw his hair. He could have sworn he heard a lie in Sirius's tone. He returned downstairs, where he saw that a lot of the Gryffindor girls had gone to bed. Lily Evans was alone.  
  
"Hey, Evans," he said with the usual arrogant grin coming over his face. She ignored him. He sat down beside her, and she pulled the book she was reading closer to her face. "We're going to tease Snivellus again," he said, grinning.  
  
Lily's eyes stopped moving, but she was still staring at her book. "Yep," James persisted, "we're going to show him to Remus, and don't pretend that you don't know what I'm talking about, I know you know about him."  
  
Lily put her book down. "You wouldn't," she said in a slow, silky voice. "That'd be murder, Potter. Not even you would do that."  
  
James nodded. "We'll watch out for him. Don't worry."  
  
"Potter! You wouldn't!" she yelled, and everyone in the vicinity turned to stare at her.  
  
"What makes you so sure?" he said with a smirk playing on his face.  
  
Lily blew her hair out of her face, and stormed out of the common room. James shrugged. He'd do it if it meant getting her. But from the looks of things, she wouldn't come near him with a ten foot pole.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
James was coming back from Arithmancy when he saw Lily Evans again. "All right, there?" he said casually. Remus, Sirius, and Peter all took Divination, whereas Arithmancy was James's subject, for his father "didn't want him to waste his school career on something as foolish as fortune telling" so he was alone. He noticed that Lily was, too, so he walked up to her.  
  
Lily stopped, her eyes narrowed, glaring at James. "If you touch Snape - "  
  
"I won't if you go out with me," he shot back in return. It was routine.  
  
Lily look frustrated. "We've been over this before," she said coldly.  
  
James's smile never dimmed. "I'll just be off to tell Sirius we're still on for tonight, then - "  
  
"FINE!" she shouted angrily. "I'll go out with you once if you stay away from him tonight! I mean it! Don't go near him! If you do, Potter, you'll wish you were never - "  
  
James's smile had widened. "I get the point. What time should we meet in Hogsmeade?"  
  
"Don't - push - it," she said heatedly, walking away from him.  
  
James punched the air. He'd gotten Evans! She had agreed to go out with him! Just once. That was all he needed...just that one date...and she'd be his...  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
The full moon was soon visible in the sky, and James had kept repeating to Sirius not to go through with his scheme, but never revealing the reason behind it; it was too embarrassing that that was how he gotten the girl of his dreams.  
  
"No way. Snivellus has been asking for this one for ages. I'm not going to give it up because you think I could kill him," Sirius said when James had begged him for the hundredth time that day to call it off. "I think it's time to go get your Invisibility Cloak, Prongs," he said, running up to the dormitory.  
  
James stood beside Peter, who was stuffing his mouth full of Honeydukes' Chocolate. "Put that away, will you? We're about to go raid Honeydukes..." James muttered to Peter, who nodded and stuffed the chocolate in the pocket of his robes.  
  
Sirius came back downstairs seconds later, his arms decidedly folded over his chest, obviously concealing the Cloak underneath. "Ready, you two?"  
  
James, for the first time since fifth year, was reluctant to slide on the Cloak. He didn't want to hide behind the largest chair in the room and slide the thing over the three of them. He didn't want to sneak off grounds. He didn't want to run with Remus. And, though he couldn't believe he was thinking it, he didn't want to poke fun at Severus Snape. He wanted to please Lily...  
  
Sirius and James slipped under the Invisibility Cloak, while Peter pretended he left his quill in the library and opened the portrait from the inside, allowing the three of them to slip out unseen. Once outside, Peter walked in the general direction of the library so as to please the Fat Lady. Once he was out of sight, he was pulled under the Cloak by the strong arms of James.  
  
Not to any of their surprise, they met Severus Snape at the foot of the stairs. James gave a glance to Sirius under the Cloak, telling him through his eyes that this wasn't right, and this was his last chance to back out. Sirius didn't look at him, he just shook his head. James sighed with relish, but proceeded on. He found the broom closet by the oak front doors and pulled it open quietly. They stepped inside, took off the Invisibility Cloak, which James folded up into the smallest square possible and stuffed in the pocket of his robes, and slid noiselessly back out.  
  
"Hello, Snivellus," Sirius said with a smirk. "Ready to see where our dear friend goes once a month?"  
  
Snape's eyes were full of loathing and malice, but he nodded nonetheless.  
  
"Great! Let's go!" Sirius said, jumping out of the hallway, past the steps, and onto the cold, wet grass. The three left behind followed them. It was a dangerous feat, sneaking out of the castle without the Invisibility Cloak nor were they in their Animagi forms.  
  
As they neared the Whomping Willow, Remus's heavy breathing and distant howls growing closer with each step, James cast a tentative glance back toward the castle. What he saw made his heart race. Lily Evans. She was watching him out of one of the high tower's windows. He felt his heart jump into his throat when he saw, after squinting closely, that she was smiling. Why was she smiling? Did she trust him? He had to do it.  
  
"STOP!" he yelled, grabbing Snape by the wrist and flinging him to the ground.  
  
"POTTER! What the hell is your problem!" he yelled, staring up at James with hate occupying every quick, shallow breath he took.  
  
"You can't do that. It'll get you killed..." he said quietly, wanting more than anything he had ever wanted in his life to be anywhere else but where he was now.  
  
"What are you on about?" Snape said, leaping off the ground.  
  
"I mean," James said loudly, anger rising, "that Remus is a werewolf!"  
  
Snape's jaw was moving, but no sound came out; Sirius was gaping at him; Peter was eating his chocolate, paying on attention to him.  
  
"Potter!" yelled a voice from behind them. James turned to see Lily Evans running at him, and he felt his stomach give way.  
  
"Hey, Evans," he said with a grin more of satisfaction than arrogance.  
  
"Lily," she corrected him. "I can't believe you didn't...you laid off Snape..."  
  
Snape was standing to the side of the other four. "You said you'd never help me," he muttered bitterly.  
  
Lily glared at him. "I didn't say I did it for you," she snapped.  
  
James's heart gave a hard thump and he was sure that this time it would jump right out of his throat. "Who'd you do it for then...Lily...?"  
  
She smiled. "You," she said quietly. "You're on your way, Potter,"  
  
"James." He grinned. Lily kissed him lightly on the cheek.  
  
She was his.  
  
A/N: YAY! YAYAYAYAYAYAYAY! I'm so happy! It actually sounds believable! WHOA! Make me feel good, and review! YAY! I fell so good right now...go on, make me happier...review it...  
  
*~LTDan~* 


End file.
